Tuesday, 30 April 2013

“LIFE” TOPIC OF AGES..!


What is Life...? Truly it’s a question of ages but in most cases it’s left unanswered...!..

Right from birth I was told that my mother conceived me in ward "B"...a lot of people gathered celebrating my "B" Birthday...my 1st Present was a “B” (bear) &was also notified that the man who carried us home had “B”-blue-bird vehicle…we lived in a humble neighborhood Chishamiso Unit-“B”…I grew up strong & “B”-brilliant young “B”-boy … attended my Primary Education @ a group “B”-School & never passed as expected since I could not shape my “Bs” so well… I proceeded to Secondary School… life never gave the impression of favor ,in everything I did…wrote my O’Level & attained all “Bs” I was so much contented with my results “B”-Before someone notified me that I had been incorporated into the ideology of False consciousness… I then proceeded to A’ Level…which I believed by its “designation” it meant Level of “A”-acquiring… life seemed easy going here…the results shocked me again when I had all “Bs”… it then became so much crystal clear that I belonged to the “B”-CLASS…in other words “2nd Class” deducing from the numerical stance of the alphabetic order…I rejected myself to something useless… I was so disheartened by the fact of belonging to the “B”-CLASS…& marveled that “from birth” to when, then...? GOD..!!.Something came into my mind and at this point I targeted radical change from this “B”-Status but the situation worsened…& I decided to just follow the wind, I looked at life’s solid side and told myself never to feel inferior or made a mediocre by elements of life that are in most cases “SOCIAL CONSTRUCTS”… “GOD KNOWS OUR RIGHT POSITIONS”…the right position is made known to everyone…. Noted in Jer: 29:11: For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.
“YOUR LEVEL IS THE BEST”….

Friday, 26 April 2013

Never go to HR for help

After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not been promoted, no transfer, no salary increase no recommendation and that the Company is not doing nothing about it. So he decided to walk up to His HR Manager one morning and after exchanging greetings, he told his HR Manager his observation. The boss looked at him, laughed and asked him to sit down saying. My friend, you have not worked here for even one day.

The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.

Manager: - How many days are there in a year?

Man: - 365 days and sometimes 366

Manager: - how many hours make up a day?

Man: - 24 hours

Manager: - How long do you work in a day?

Man: - 8a.m to 4pm. i.e. 8 hours a day.

Manager: - So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours?

Man: - (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 hours i.e. 1/3(one third)

Manager: - That is nice of you! What is one-third of 366 days?

Man: - 122 (1/3x366 = 122 in days)

Manager: - Do you come to work on weekends?

Man: - No sir

Manager: - How many days are there in a year that is weekends?

Man: - 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equals to 104 days

Manager: - Thanks for that. If you remove 104 days from 122 days, how many days do you now have?

Man: - 18 days.

Manager: - OK! I do give you 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do you have remaining?

Man: - 4 days

Manager: - Do you work on New Year day?

Man: - No sir!

Manager: - Do you come to work on workers day?

Man: Nor sir!

Manager: - So how many days are left?

Man: - 2 days sir!

Manager: - Do you come to work on the (National holiday)?

Man: - No sir!

Manager: - So how many days are left?

Man: - 1 day sir!

Manager: - Do you work on Christmas day?

Man: - No sir!

Manager: - So how many days are left?

Man: - None sir!

Manager: - So, what are you claiming?

Man: - I have understood, Sir. I did not realize that I was stealing Company money all these days.

Moral - NEVER GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!

Have a Nice Day.
HR = HIGH RISK

Tuesday, 2 April 2013

Nurse aide raped in mortuary at Parirenyatwa

In his defence outline, Goto claimed he was the nurse aide’s lover for two years. Prosecutor Ms Tinashe Kanyemba alleges that on October 1 last year at about 6:30pm the complainant met Goto in the corridor at their workplace and grabbed her handbag. The State says the complainant resisted, but she was overpowered and Goto dragged her into his office which is in the morgue. He is alleged to have indecently assaulted her before raping her. During the incident, the State says, their workmate Mr Stan Chikondo knocked at the door and Goto got up and put on his clothes and the complainant followed suit. After a minute, Mr Chikondo got inside the room and saw the complainant crying and asked what was happening. The complainant, it is alleged, told Goto that she was going to the matron and he followed her. Along the way Goto allegedly pleaded with the complainant not to report the matter. Mr Muranda, it is alleged, phoned Goto who came to his office and upon quizzing, the mortuary attendant admitted to the crime and apologised saying he would do “something” for the complainant. On October 4 the same year Goto’s wife phoned the complainant telling her she wanted to discuss the issue. The complainant phoned Goto after failing to get hold of his wife and he told her to wait. After Goto’s wife did not turn up, the complainant made a report that led to Goto’ arrest.